Smiling Potatoes of Death

I had a friend who, unwittingly, started me on what is turning out to be a life-long ‘hobby’ years ago. Jon Anthony was a lawyer by trade but, more importantly to me, he was also a drummer extraordinaire. He was, in his college days, a member of a touring band. I’m a mediocre guitar player and singer and together we made various attempts at forming a rock band, never getting that far because of various pressures of work, family, etc. A bit quirky, Jon – seriously, I think – insisted that our band would not be successful unless we named it the Smiling Potatoes of Death. I just didn’t get it, and said I could come up with a thousand names better than that. Thus the on-going hobby. Jon stuck to his guns, though, and nothing I could come up with could compare (in his mind) to the SPoD. I don’t play publicly much anymore, and am long past dreaming of fronting a successful band (actually was in a couple of pretty good ones, but that’s another story), but every once in a while I still stumble across what I think might be a pretty good name for a rock band. Sometimes I even remember it and write it down.

Jon passed away last year, and the drumming world is poorer for it. But my quest for a better name goes on. Another friend once suggested Lukewarm Shit (not quite HOT, I guess), and we always joked about the crowd we’d attract if we put up posters around town about the next appearance of a band named Free Food. Following is a pretty long (but not-quite-complete) list of band names I've come up with, which I will continue to add to occasionally. Feel free to offer suggestions. And Rest In Peace, Jon Anthony.

Smiling Potatoes of Death Winning Ugly Smoker The Dolts Rain Dance Myth Expanding Universe Theory Monkey Wrench The Fools Lunatics Plumbobs Luminaries Heartstone Backseat Drivers Acumen LCD Elevators dB’s The Loiterers Root Squared Odd Fellows Atomic Café Past Masters Breaking Point laughlaugh Company of Strangers Earth Movers Crucible Jive Counsel White Noise Laughing Dogs Wave Mechanics Druids The Willies Style Points Cherry Pickers deep space creation latitude The Beseiged The Proverbial Beat The Ruminators The Commoners Old Yellers chameleons Tom Foolery The Brotherhood Cacaphonators Whistleblowers The Taildraggers Oscillators The Castaways Neutrons Note to Self Youth In Asia 1000 Voices Sound FX Bangers and Mash Dearly Departed Grave Robbers The Hassles Willing Minds The Mockingbirds Hell’s Bells Petrified Rock In One Ear Gophers Buzz The Front The Maji joyride Prime Mover Raw Crude Timbre Wolves Dead Ringers The Fallen Saddle Tramps Suffering Fools Windbreakers hushhush Foxgloves Deaf Be Damned Mythmakers 3 Sheets Tainted Logic Love Handles The Locals Pressure Cookers Zygotes lovesick puppies The Tumblers Power House Chin Music Air Pirates Jungle Rules Storied Life Flyers Northern Lights Algebra Sucks Happenstance Lap Dogs Zealots Rodeo Clowns Grace May Day Hoops The Mudpuppies Quake magic WitsEnd Perpetual Motion gas Works Mutual Admiration Society Native Tongue brew ha ha Ring Masters crackers The Dipsticks Local 1022 Bulldozers the loons Babble On The Whatnots Sleeping Giant Ice Breakers Dream Merchant Pounce The Skewers The Wild Hogs Pleides Wonderland Blue Devils Thunder Cloud Rampage Tirade Intruder Alert The Goon Squad Last Gasp Quacks Lunatic Fringe HearSay The UnderDogs The Mill the jugglers Medflys noodles The Bereaved Groove Tube SRO Dusk As Luck Would Have It The Prowlers The Gooney Birds Monument to Stupidity Noble Savage Howler Monkeys The Nomads Artificial Meat Products Peacocks Hasty Pudding Pastry Chefs A la Mode Huff 'n Puff URSA The Noted Guilt by Association The Sounding Board Polecats Second Wind Elan saucers punch Standard Deviation ’78 Dodgers Blueprint beggars Burger Thieves Pork Butts Slave to Rhythm Trance The Reckoning Blind Ambition the crib Home Curmudgeons Wave The Goners Critical Mass Circadian Rhythm Oahu Walking Sticks Marauders Bottle Rockets Bum Kin Hunter-Gatherers

Lost Souls None The Wiser Thick As Thieves The Migrants New Vibration Sync The Nightcrawlers Big Thunder Windmills Recluse StrawBoss After Life Nit Pickers The Light Fantastic The Therapeudics The Overlords Playthings Headstone Head Pins Rhythm Press Great Expectations Air Drums The Sounding Board Basket Case Aces Blowhards Ultrasonic Jazz Mine Ground Zero The Bull Pen The Resistance The Deadbeats Town Crier Mutiny Bound Carpetbaggers The Watchmen The Defendants goobers Spontaneous Combustion Mystery Ship Mankind Creatures of Habit Dreamers Trips The Breaks Bad Actors Rhythm Method Barrel Full of Monkeys Underground Rock and Gem Club Movers and Shakers earWhigs Horses The Great Beyond The Pump House foragers The Reign The Shamans KeyNote The Besotted fool’s paradise The Plaintiffs Generators Fossil Fuel Wax Arhythmic The Ltd. Pin Heads Blue Moves Sleeper The Indentured Rube Old School Poachers SaySo The Rattlers Bully Pulpit ChickenLips Mary’s Ex Joy Ladder Rolling Thunder Jabberwocky Pink Noise Soul Kitchen Procrastinators Fox Hounds Stereo Types Party of Five Fortune's Favorites Balloons Monkey Works Spaz Attack Finders Keepers The Parables Loose Nuts Vagabonds Pax Romana Floaters Dipthongs The American Public The Moonlighters The Scapegoats The Seers Prospectors The Incurables Golden Boys The Tattle Tales The Usual Suspects The Perps Warblers The Mosquitoes The Believers Marbles Slow Roll The Brethren Threshold Liar’s Club Bunches of Love Sway Universal Mind Toad Prophets Sneaker Up Maestros SenseAbility PenUltimates Chaos Of Human Bondage Wet Paint The Madhatters The Jerry Atrix Band Sugar Daddies Liquid Assets Leading Zeroes The Calling guise The Woodshed Renegade Promenade Bones Oragami Banshees Middle Ages Tattle Tails Touchtones Scooter Streamers ScatterBrain Vision Thing Telltale Hearts Shut Up and Drive Half Life Big Bang Search Party Ground Zero Cycle Attaboys Lucid Dreamers Rock Island Big Compromise Liberty Bonds Color Wheel Greyhounds Showboat The Guild Fresh Meat Mumble Yak Papasan Whatchamacallits The Unknowns Blister The Laughing Buddha Bad Religion Scape Goats Monkey Do Voice of America The Mill Noodles The High Priests Free Radicals Clinging Vines Primates faux pas Droppings The Alarmists outliers CrashCourse Cognizant Dissidents Aces Up Peices of Eight baileywick